24

GAY PEOPLE'S CHRONICLE OCTOBER 1, 1995

THE MOSTLY UNFABULOUS SOCIAL LIFE OF ETHAN GREEN...

AS MUCH THERAPY AS YOU CAN STAND.

...

(NO COPAYMENT)

So ANYWAY, AS I WAS SAYANG, ETIENNE IS LIKE THIS COMPLETE ASS. BUT HE'S CERTAINLY GOT A GUTE ASS,HA HA! I MEAN IT'S LIKE I HAVEN'T BEEN SO TURNED ON IN YEARS!.. CAUSE. WELL, THIS'S A LITTLE EMBARRASSING, I MEAN, HE LIKES IT A BAT.. (EHEM).. ROUGH, Y'KNOW., WELL, DOUG ACTUALLY DID LIKE THAT TOO, SOME

SAY, THIS

UNLIMITED THERAPY DEAL'S PRETTY FABULOUS!

GOOD THING

I THUNK

IT UP..

TIMES BUT I LOVED

DOUG, Y'KNOW?

SO THAT'S KIND

OF DIFFERENT

PROBABLY...

I GUESS

PALM

READINGS

THE

ETHAN GREEN CONTRACT WITH

AMERICA

THREE PAID DAYS OFF BEFORE HALLOWEEN TO NO SALES TAX ON CUTE

PLAN COSTUME.

THIS IS AN ESPECIALLY IMPORTANT ASPECT OF OUR PROPOSAL. HALLOWEEN MUST BE HONORED!

IN DENMARK THEY GET 5 DAYS OFF FOR THIS,Y'KNOW.

OH IT'S TRUE

OUTFITS.

MR. SPEAKER, OBVIOUSLY THIS BILL'S NECESSITY IS LOST ON YOU, BECAUSE SIR, YOU HAVE NO CUTE OUTFITS. HOWEVER FOR MILLIONS OF STYLISH GAY MEN, & THEAR LIPSTICK LESBIAN ALLIES, THE PURCHASE OF VERSACE, DIESEL

& GAUTIER IS A MATTER OF GRAVE CONSEQUENCE

LOBSTER NEWBERG SCHOOL LUNCH INITIATIVE.

BUT, ETHAN, IF CATSUP ISN'T THE VEGETABLE ANYMORE, WHAT IS P EXPENSIVE CARROT CAKE.

GOODY

·

•

By Eric Ormer.

TIGHTER "ABS" (MORE GERMAN CHOCOLATE CAKE)

TASK FORCE.

HEY, SHOULDN'T WE BE DOING S'MORE "GRUNCHES” P........I MEAN, IT DOES SAY TIGHTER ALS" (MORE GERMAN CHOCOLATE CAKE) TASK FORCE. INST

BELCH

Bumble

LOOK, YOU WANNA BE

A BOYSCOUT P.

DO IT ON YER OWN TIME. NOT UNCLE SAM'S. NOW SHADDUPH AN EAT MORE OF THAT CAKE...

BUFF NEW GUY AT THE GYM WILL BE HOT FOR YOU, WON'T NOTICE YOUR BEST FRIEND AT ALL, PILOT PROGRAM.

OH YEA.

OH OH MY. Please

Dykes To Watch Out For

LET GO

AND LET MO

10-15!

COME DOWN HERE PLEASE

UM..COULD YOU EXCUSE ME

A MINUTE, BABE?

SHEESH! WHAT DO YOU WANT, SPARROW?!

WHAT IS THIS DOING IN THE REFRIGERATOR?

PA

000

Wow! A BOTTLE OF DRECK'S DARK! THAT WAS MY FAVORITE!

SONYA BROUGHT

IT OVER TO HAVE WITH DINNER LATER. WHY?

I USED TO LOVE TO KNOCK BACK TWO OR THREE OF THESE WHILE I WAS COOKING. IT WAS THE SECRET INGREDIENT IN MY STIR-FRY! I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO GET THE FLAVOR RIGHT SINCE.

LOIS, I THOUGHT WE AGREED NOT TO BRING ALCOHOL

INTO THE HOUSE!

OH, YEAH. I GUESS I WASN'T THINKING. I

MEAN, IT'S JUST A BOTTLE OF

BEER.

AH, THAT DARK AMBER LIQUID... THE HEAVY, MALTY FEEL AS I SWALLOWED... THE BITTER TASTE OF HOPS LEFT ON MY TONGUE... THE SOOTHING BUZZ SETTING IN JUST BEHIND MY CHEEKBONES...

JUNE,

GIVE ME THAT!

1994 BY ALISON BECHDEL

RELAX! I'M NOT GONNA POUR NINE MONTHS OF SOBRIETY DOWN THE HATCH. I'M JUST REMINISCING!

183

LOIS, COULD YOU PLEASE GET RID OF

THIS?

SKRITCH

•∙SCRABBLE

WHADDAYA WANT ME TO DO? MAKE SONYA DRINK IT ON THE PORCH?! DING DONG ARARARE! WOOF!

LIGGER

C'MON IN, MO. WE'RE JUST HAVING

A DOMESTIC DISPUTE.

OH, GOOD. I'M ON MY WAY HOME FROM THERAPY. MAYBE YOU'LL DISTRACT ME FROM MY OWN PETTY TRIBULATIONS. HI, DIGGER!

YIP!

SPARROW, I'M A BIG GIRL! YOU DON'T HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF ME!

YOU'RE RIGHT. I'M SORRY. BUT HAVING THIS IN THE HOUSE MAKES ME REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE.

SPARROW, I WON'T BRING BEER HOME AGAIN. BUT CAN WE JUST OVERLOOK IT THIS TIME? I MEAN, WHAT CAN I DO NOW THAT IT'S HERE?

תחן

AH, THAT SMELL! IT'S CLUB ON A SWEATY SUMMER NIGHT... BEER ON EVERYONE'S BREATH... BEER SOAKING THE SAWDUST UNDERFOOT... THE BARTENDER SWINGING FOUR FROSTY LONGNECKS IN ONE CAPABLE HAND...

UM... WHOOPS.

DIGGER! NO!

OBFAA.

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